Struggle to create new behaviours?
Try this, you will need a pen and paper
I am sure you have heard of values and acting in-line with your values. But if you are unsure values are individual beliefs that motivate people to act one way or another
Write down some values that apply to you, aim for around five.
Values are common concepts such as, Fairness, Honesty, Growth, Autonomy and Balance, but may include ones that are just yours!
If you have issues, try searching online, or asking someone what they think your values are. This list from James Clear (Author of Atomic Habits) is a great starter.
So say your goal is to drop bodyfat, but you have close friends and family who do not have that goal.
Frustrating!
Let's say your value is Autonomy
Then in that moment you can check in with yourself and ask yourself, is this going to move me closer towards my goal or further way. Am I making choices based on other people's values instead of my own? Sometimes our values and our goals are in conflict, and that's ok! A part of the choice point is a reminder that we do not have to default to the first response–a gradual awareness leading to change.
We can use a "Choice Point" worksheet to map out
Mapping out your goals, values, thoughts, feelings can help you identify if your goals and action's are truly aligned with you.
"The Choice Point", comes from the book The Weight Escape: How to Stop Dieting and Start Living. To learn more about the history of the Choice Point visit The ACT Matrix. If you find the content in this post useful, it may help to seek out a therapist who has experience with the ACT framework, or try the book "The Happiness Trap"
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